big fat yes
2006-02-02, 8:30 a.m.

The answers to yesterdays questions: big fat yes. I can marry a man who still has residual feelings for someone else. I mean, she's the mother of his child, first person he's done a lot of things with, he was very inexperienced before he met me. Point is, once he's with me those feelings will fade and if I'm going to give up on something this great because of residue, well that's just stupid. Hell, even just seeing me face to face again could kill what bacteria she left behind.

He's going to wake up one day, hopefully soon, and think to himself "what the hell was I doing without her? Why did this take me so long?" And that residue will fade away as he realizes how much better life can be when he just lets it be that way.

**I'm about to write dirty things, hide your eyes if you'd rather**

And then when things we try start happening, that'll change a lot. When he comes home to find me masturbating on the couch like he wants to. Or dropping to my knees in front of him the minute he's in the door. Oh, how I miss unfastening those pants. I am so looking forward to the first time I have him in my hand again. I haven't felt him in months.

It's ridiculous of me to think he could love her more than me. It's just the distance that's making it seem that way. Once he's got me in his arms, sliding his hand up my back, my mouth on his, feeling me press my body against him and reminding him that some women LIKE to be touched, and that this woman likes nothing more than to be touched by him, she'll shake out of his mind like an etch a sketch. The way she always does.