shitty week with a good ending
2006-03-07, 6:55 p.m.

Wow. Has a lot ever happened in the last six days.

New guy and I broke up. And it hurt me a LOT. A lot more than I expected it to. After I explained all the things he was taking the wrong way (his friend {who had never met me before} said I was being 'emotional' at the club when he wasn't there, which was actually me being powerfully horny after the violet wand {"Yeah, now that I think of it, you weren't pissy or anything when I got there. You just kinda, threw yourself over me." YEAH, cause I was battling the megahorn, dumbass!} and how he thought I was moving to Cols "for him" which couldn't be less the truth, I'm moving for ME, so I can get out of the nest and do things on my own for the first time EVER and I don't want to live with ANYONE but Shortman {"Oh, well, I understand that." Of course you do.}) He felt really stupid. He started talking like things could still be the same. Truth be told, I was wanting to slow it down, too. I can't afford to come up there every weekend, especially with leaving my job. But, he started the whole thing with "I'm not ready for a relationship" which is something you can NOT un-say, and I'm not going to stick around waiting for the other shoe to drop.

I don't know what it is about guys who go on and on about how they want girls to like them. Then they see a girl they like and it's all "Oh, she likes me too! RUN AWAY!!

I don't play games.

I moped around about new guy for the entirety of Friday, and Saturday during the day. I went to the club anyway, because we're getting back on our every-other-weekend schedule, of course new guy didn't show. I didn't expect him to. But I'd made a secret pledge with myself that if he happened to show up and say "let's forget the whole conversation" I was going to do it. Yeah, I'm weak.

But he didn't show. His friend, who intro'd us, came by himself. He's got his own car, and his own place, two things new guy didn't have and won't have for quite some time. Not that it made a difference, just pointing some things out.

We'll call him Hair Guy. Cause it's gorgeous. Hair Guy hadn't talked to new guy all week. I didn't say anything about what happened. Hair Guy was dancing with Random to help her make Santa Hat Guy jealous, then she left he and I on the dancefloor together. He started putting the moves on me...I was quite surprised. I actually walked off the floor at one point to gather myself. What was I going to do? I sought out Random for a girl conference. Should I pull Hair Guy? Cause I totally can...but it'll be the ultimate kiss-off to new guy and I ever getting back together. "Are you going to wait for new guy forever?" No, I'm not. I'm not going to sit here with a sign around my neck "hold for new guy." Either you want me or you don't, and if you blow it you blow it. I pulled him.

I walked back on that floor, danced for a couple seconds, and allowed him the kiss he'd been trying for. Later, we went for a breath of fresh air, I told him I wasn't seeing his friend anymore. He's all "Oh, okay." He didn't care if I was, but didn't say in so many words. I could've said "don't ever let new guy find out about this" and I would've gotten the same reaction. At first I thought he was just assuming I was a total whore, but as the night wore on I came to realize he just really, really likes me and is more than willing to sell his friend short if it means I leave the club on his arm.

It's happened to me more than once. I don't like getting between friends, but sometimes it happens and always because of things like this. The guys just make the decision that I'm worth more than their friendship no matter how you slice it.

I'm lucky I wasn't born in 18th century France, or there'd have been a few duels by now.

So I had the best time I have EVER had in my LIFE with Hair Guy. REALLY didn't expect my time with him to be THAT GOOD. But it was. Remains to be seen if it'll get weird, let's all hope New Guy doesn't call me, and if he does, that Hair Guy has the presence of mind not to answer the phone I accidentally left on his nightstand. Or at least, lacks the vindictive streak that could also cause him to answer the phone.